― John Steinbeck, The Acts of King Arthur and His Noble Knights
Today I just feel defeated. I guess you need to feel that way sometimes... it's humbling. Yesterday in Kung Fu, I got punched in the face again. Last week the same thing happened. My nose bled. Clearly, I need to learn to move out of the way faster. I felt like all last night, I just kept getting my arms tangled. I felt like an uncoordinated person flapping my arms wildly. If you are a runner, imagine that you have been making progress. You are feeling great as you increase the miles, but one day, it's like your legs are mud. Like you are running for the first time even though you've been training for 8 months. You can't breathe well. You feel out of shape. The next day you run and feel the same way. Your legs are jello. It's like that. One day, I think I'm getting stronger and improving, but then WHAM.. suddenly I'm struggling like a fish out of water. Additionally, today I had my first driving lesson (I've been driving since I was 15), and I felt terrible about it. I hit a curb! Also, I stalled my car. Ugh! How embarrassing! Then, tonight at Kung Fu, I couldn't hold one of my stances. My legs started to shake, and I dropped to the floor. I felt so weak. I feel like I can't do anything right. Steve says that I should focus more on the fact that I'm still making an effort. I'm trying to do that, but I still feel... defeated.
Anyway, back to the driving lesson. He said I did many things well, but we have to fix some things. For example, when you are approaching a junction and want to turn left, the following must occur:
- Check your mirrors and make it obvious
- Ease on the brake
- Clutch (I killed the car at this point because I'm used to pushing the clutch first and then the brake to avoid stalling)
- Stop the car in a curved position that shows your path is following the curb, not approaching the junction straight (I ran over a curb trying to over-correct for this once.. sighs)
- Pull out when safe while following the curb so that you don't swing out too far.